What did you bring for us?

After my two weeks of relaxation and rejuvenation, I was ready to come back and take over the world. I have come back to this socially acceptable harassment of what did you bring for us. This morning my tailor, who only comes to my house when she wants to expedite a payment, came over at a quarter-past eight o’clock. Seeing as I was in mid work dress mode, I threw on a robe and went to see her. When I asked her why she was there she said she wanted to make sure I was home to ask what I brought back for her.
I have only been back for a few days and the first thing everyone I have seen has asked me is “what did you bring for us?” When I say everyone, I mean, most of the people in my office including the young man who operates and services our generator, the people who look after my house, our driver, my uncle’s driver and the people who run the chemist near my house.
The average travelling individual is allowed to take 2 bags with a linear dimension up to 158cm and weighing up to23 kilograms each. You can also have a small bag of carry-on luggage that can be 56cm by 45cm by 25cm at most, oh and a purse (not withstanding your chromosome branding)
Now, I explain this to you because even if ALL these people were in my sights to buy things for, who do I look like Yar’Adua’s next governor-entrusted kid? If you add up all the people in my family from both sides the numbers are going into the hundreds. I will leave out friends and significant other for the sake of argument but financial restraints notwithstanding, where the hell am I supposed to put it all?
I finally rifled through my un-unpacked bags and found two Snickers bars at the bottom. I then had to apologise to her that I had not brought her more and when she seems content with the fact that the chocolate was just to placate her and she was worthy of more she left. I wondered what kind of delusional self-importance allows your tailor to harass you before your first cup of coffee for a present that she was not entitled to in the first place. If I had that kind of confidence I’m pretty sure I would rule the world